Tag Archives: questions

How ya Doin? Fine. How you Doin? Fine. You Sure you Okay? Well, I’ve Been Better. Yeah, I’ve Been Better, Too. Actually, I’m Feeling Pretty Rotten. Yeah, I’m Gonna Lie Down.

3338c80e2bfdff47c21d3eec4fba9398          Looking back on my blog, it was obvious my previous post was centered around words, and why not? What’s better than words when you’re a writer?

          Words take many forms. I particularly like the, “Hi”’s, “How ya doin”’s and the responses they elicit. When it comes to greeting another your choices are somewhat limited: “Hi, Hello, Salutations, Hey, Greetings, Yo, What’s up, How ya doin,” and the like.

          When you respond to one of these greetings, especially if it contains a question, the sky is the limit. You must be careful when asking someone, how they are doing; you might get more than you bargained for. Answers you may encounter: “Fine, Okay, Good, Not so good,” and everything from a runny nose to the plague, just to name a few.

My favorite responses have to be those from the good ol boy belt of which I am a member: “Fair, Fair to middlin, Tolerable, Seen better days, Been worse, If I got any better I couldn’t stand myself and Just as well as if I had good sense.”

It all boils down to words. In and of themselves they can be most anything…but I guess that’s up to each one of us.

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Thinking is Way Overrated. Thoughtless Drooling[-Now, That’s the Ticket

In the years I have been putting ink to paper, or more appropriately virtual ink to virtual paper (it is required by law that brain triviaI phrase it that way because some of what I’ve been doing sure ain’t what you would call writing) I have learned a great many things, both pro and con.

For instance: the average person’s vocabulary stops growing at the ripe old age of 25. This tells me your average wordsmith possesses a more active brain. I’ve been told (and not to toot my own horn) that I excel at trivia. Now, if we dissect the trivia (at which I admittedly excel), we discover that I have more than likely beaten the 25 year brain atrophy problem, but at what cost? Had I learned lifesaving techniques, photography, or even how to make a decent jar of strawberry preserves, that would at least have been something. But for some reason my brain tends to hold on to a large percentage of what my ears suck into my head, i.e. trivia. If we examine this word, it’s very name defines it as useless information. So what have I actually learned? Oh, if you want to know the exact time the pillagian snorkley grappler gives birth to 16 babies averaging 24 pounds each, or how many blaylocks in a glorch, I’m your man; but, alas, I am relegated to spend my days watching photographers take pictures of EMTs saving people choking on strawberry preserve sandwiches.

If I were a bettin’ man, I’d wager you’ve learned quite a bit during your writing career. Since I cannot share your personal experiences, I will take it upon myself to regale you with more of my informational hi-jinx.

Another prime example: When you spell a word wrong, in some cases deleting a single letter and replacing it will correct the aforementioned mistake. I’ve misspelled words at the beginning of a sentence and deleted the entire sentence just to get at the unacceptable grammar.

This brings about an entirely different conundrum. What happens to the letters, especially the ones doing their job in the correctly spelled words? Are they recycled and used again? Are they destroyed and tossed into our already overly used landfill system? Or could it be these victims of the 26 club (a.k.a. the alphabet) whisked away right from under our noses and sold on the digital ebony bazaar.

This series of unanswered questions leads us deeper and deeper into the abyss of inescapable analog tar pits. A classic question I’m sure on everyone’s lips: If the unused letters, digits and symbols were thrown willy nilly into a landfill, would they outlast the diapers and plastic bottles?… I guess only time will tell.

How many times have you touched your keyboard in some unusual way, only to find it did something beneficial you weren’t aware of? And of course, the first words out of your mouth were, “I had no idea it could do that. Had I known I could have saved a bundle on erasers and white out.”

But alas, we live and learn.

As I bring another post to a close, I’d like to leave you with this one thought: Writing can bring you into unimaginable worlds, especially if your writing is centered around writing about unimaginable worlds. So take time to think about the things that have been opened to you just through writing. But never forget that thinking can be dangerous if those thoughts are thought when thinking should not be thought of. Being there is a fine line between genius and the ramblings of an idiot, I will leave you to ponder these thoughts in whichever way your thought process leads you to think. As for me, I’m sensing a strong wave of stupid washing over, ready to drop at any moment.

After all, near as I can tell it’s way past time (possibly days) for my medication… and I think a nap may be in order.

Keep writing, keep thinking and most importantly keep your chin up. If you keep it down you can’t see where you’re going and you’ll run into things.

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Why Come, How for, and other Such Silly Notions

Vintage Romance Novels

Vintage Romance Novels

Have you ever wondered why things are the way they are? I don’t mean things that have any real meaning, but instead things that more or less represent the epitome of useless information. If so, then jump on the bandwagon with me as we explore these hopeless bits.

Take for instance, Fabio. Now I’m secure enough in my masculinity to be able to admit that Fabio is a good-looking guy. He has graced the cover of many romance novels. Now here’s the part I have a hard time justifying. The images that appear on these covers are not photographs, but drawings.  In this world we have talented artists that could easily draw a make-believe cover model that would rival any living person, and the best part of this situation is that drawings don’t demand huge salaries. To me it’s a no-brainer. Write a novel, draw a nonexistent cover model and save a bucket ‘o’ bucks.

Here’s another:

Why do famous, beautiful female celebrities appear in hair color commercials, but never grace the box themselves? The cardboard containers seem to be reserved for attractive yet less well known faces. Maybe the hair color folks got smart and in order to save megabucks decided to go with unknowns. Move over Fabio, looks like the freebies are coming after you.

And now we move to the infamous couch cover. Did your grandmother or mother ever buy a new couch and immediately spread a cover over it for protection? Your family may have owned this davenport For 20 years but you never saw what it actually looked like until it was time to throw it away. This is a great segue into what we called when I was a child “the living room.” This room was never used unless special company (a preacher, for instance) came to pay us a visit. It was like owning a time capsule that one could go to study the ancient furniture and obsolete fabrics still in pristine condition. Often, clear plastic would adorn these articles to afford additional protection.

Here’s the point at which I would normally begin to conclude my thoughts by writing something like, “in conclusion,” or “to sum up,” or “I’ll finish this post with.” But you have to admit it sure has been fun delving into the world of models, Grandmothers, couch covers and archaeological furnishings. This time, however, I’m going to leave you with a question. Something that hasn’t happened yet, but has the possibility, nay the probability, of coming to fruition in the very near future.

Computer generated images (C.G.I.) have brought movies to astounding heights of realism. These computer geniuses are coming very close to being able to replicate the human form including body movement, facial features and all of our many nuances and idiosyncrasies. What if, unbeknownst to the general public, a moviestar could be created using this technology? After performing in film after film this cybernetic actor would be bolstered on to the pedestal of megastar, seemingly earning millions per film but in truth no more able to spend a dollar than the proverbial church mouse.

And this begs another question be answered: What will become of the millions made? Will this money be spread around within the filmmaking community, or will the technicians who hold this power within their little palms become the new Hollywood heartthrobs? Rest assured, when there is money to be made, someone will be there to wrap their grubby little paws around it.

Hmm…Could be fodder for my next bestseller.

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