Tag Archives: Fiction

Thinking is Good, but Don’t Think too Much it Can Make Your Thoughts Way too Much to Think About Thoughtfully

Does a “what if” ever enter your mind? How about a “I never thought about that before?” or maybe just an errant thought from nowhere begins to bounce around in your cranium causing you to pause or maybe even chuckle. Fortunately, this happens to me all the time, bringing about fodder to keep to myself or share with the world.

For instance, American author L. Frank Baum, creator of the amazing story, “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz,” instilled in me a notion that was intriguing but useless to the story. Now why this came to mind I haven’t a clue, but I thought about the wicked witch of the west. We all know that Dorothy dissolved the old biddy with water. This led me down another road. If the wicked witch of the west couldn’t tolerate water, this would mean she’d never taken a bath. Can you imagine the odoriferous stench emanating from this smelly winch? I guess that would explain her green color and the reason she was so mean.

In my own writing, I feel sure I put a bit of myself into most characters. This tends to have a good and bad side. I find in my own life I try to avoid certain situations, but allow the same situation to abound within a character adding a “how could he be so reckless” to the story. I think what I’m trying to say is when it comes down to it there is no need to be stubborn on top of stupid. We’ve all heard the saying, “writing fiction is harder than writing non-fiction; fiction has to be believable.” Always remember there’s a fine line between believable fiction and “way out there,” and it’s hard enough to get read without being so high into the clouds where only the migrating geese might take a gander.

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Insects Make Up a Large Percentage of the World’s Protein Intake…Mmm, Mmm…Make Mine Extra Crispy

I love to cook, and believe it or not, I enjoy eating now and again. food chainThe thing I found odd concerning one of my first works of fiction was a particularly negative review. The complainant’s problem (one of several) was that too many scenes were centered around food.

Now, maybe I’m wrong (I don’t think so) but ever since I was a young’n, any time we had a gathering there was always food. I would never venture to presume and at the same time never hesitate to assume that maybe (and this is pure conjecture) this person doesn’t like people or food. (just saying)

Where was I?…That’s right, food. Generally speaking (and I mean generally to the ninth degree) it seems to me there are two types of diners, those that eat any and everything and those who dine exclusively on bugs and slugs.

In a slightly more specific grouping, we have carnivores, herbivores, and omnivores. If we delve a little deeper into the culinary world of stuff, we find the majority of bipedal diners are omnivores. After these, herbivores and there’s gotta be at least a small percentage of strict carnivores out there.

We can take it a step further and research each one of these categories separately. If we start with the omnivore in its purest form, we will discover a plethora of fresh fruits, vegetables, grains and grass fed meats. This equates to good, wholesome fare for the ones who choose to eat this way.

Now, if you want to take these foods and turn them into pure garbage just add the word convenience. We manage to take what God has created, force it into cans and boxes, inject the protein for increased weight gain and turn healthy fare to poison. A good rule of thumb is the more human beings touch your food after it’s picked or dispatched, the less you’ll want to eat it.

Next, we have your herbivores. Not my choice when sitting down for a daily meal, but certainly acceptable for those who wish to eat this way.

Finally, you have those who eat meat exclusively. Personally, I enjoy vegetables too much to ever take on this lifestyle, but can certainly understand the attraction.

Of course, when writing, especially science fiction your characters can dine on anything from Denevian slug eggs to Zoriak tongue barbeque.

It just makes you wonder; the next time you bite into a familiar favorite, take time to ponder: Is this actually what it says it is or some imported interplanetary processed food stuffs?

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The More Things Change the More They Remain

Even though it goes without saying, I’m gonna say it, “This world sure is a funny place.”space junk

I’ve written about other worlds, alternate Earths, parallel dimensions and none of them compare to the rock we call home.

As I have heard it said, and excuse me for paraphrasing, “Fiction is more difficult to write than nonfiction. Fiction must be believable.”

You can write about an alien being who lives on an active volcanic planet, eats rocks, poops yo-yos and attends the toy convention each year on Alpha Centauri.

How about survival on an actual caustic world–a world devoid of land with nothing but a sea of hydrochloric acid waiting to be fed?

Believe it or not a colony thrives in this environment. They are the Helicobacter pylori. To locate this ecosystem and these hardy creatures simply swallow. Your offering would be accepted, devoured and even added to your own recommended daily allowance (RDA) of stuff.

Let’s switch gears a moment and talk about the green movement, not the one that’s all the buzz here on earth, but the one a little further off the ground. Oh, you can bet plenty of people are in the know; it just hasn’t gained the worldwide notoriety of its cousin.

Why you ask?

It could be that Henny Penny hasn’t ventured outside for several decades. Personally, I’m holding fast to the theory that assumes it’s because hunks of smoldering garbage haven’t started falling out of the sky on a regular basis. I’m talking about space junk.

I know that “the sky is falling” crisis is true because I have spent an exhaustive amount of time reading and studying its effects. If you will turn your attention to the previous paragraph (the one that begins with Henny Penny) I will state un-categorically that I have read those three lines many times.

If you will then turn your attention to the paragraph just below this one, I will once again pledge to having scoured the text. This will prove that not only have I read extensively but am now considered the leading authority of what I have written.

Do you remember that old adage, what goes up, must come down? Well, over the past sixty years or so we’ve sent enormous amounts of high tech gadgetry up to space that have ignored the time-honored cliché and chosen not to come back down. I’m going to be the first to give this latest crisis a name: “Metal Mayhem.”

What I have been able to determine is this. As soon as the metal appliance is free from the gravitational pull of the earth it becomes a rogue, no longer obeying even the simplest laws of physics.

I sense they will be gathering at some point in time to do something. Until then, I will keep you apprised of any new developments.

Changing gears once again to the green movement on the surface of our planet (of which I am a proponent), God gave us this beautiful planet for our home and we are charged to be good stewards concerning everything within our power.

The latest issue I have to question are the cardboard tubes, or the lack thereof, at the center of a roll of toilet tissue.

One company has removed the dastardly tubes to prevent them from entering our landfills. It seems to me if we maintain landfills in order to dispose of trash, then what better trash to dispose of than paper products?

They come from trees, which we plant exclusively for pulpwood to make paper products. Once a cardboard tube hits a landfill and the tiniest bit of water comes in contact with it, I would imagine it would begin reciting the wicked witch of the West’s death dialogue.

“What a world, what a world,” the tube would moan (much like its green faced counterpart) as it dissolved into a puddle of goo. Who knows, perhaps cardboard tubes are actually good for the environment. They would supply ground nutrients it would not normally receive unless a tree fell and rotted.  Since the cardboard rots a few billion times faster, I believe I’ll opt for the toilet tubes.

The opinions expressed in this article are not necessarily anyone’s, but can be attributed to the ramblings of a madman.

I’m tired of playing now…… I believe I’ll take my drool cup and go home.

Please lock up when you leave.

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