Tag Archives: East

Science Fiction, Fantasy and the Like Should Pull You In, Chew You Up and Metaphorically Beat You to a Pulp Before it Spits You Out, Ready for the Next Ride

Writing of course takes a bit of thought whether you’re beginning a manuscript, in the middle or putting the finishing touches on your latest novel. I find that in the middle of the thoughts reserved for said manuscript move ???aside allowing outlandish discourse to float to the surface of my brain. Sometimes these thoughts drag me away from what is supposed to be the blog I am writing and into the clutches of nonsense.

For instance, if I were traveling around the globe and headed in an Easterly direction, no matter how long or how far my travels take me, I’d still be moving east. If I were to turn around and head in a Westerly direction the same is true regardless of the distance or travel time. I would still be traveling west.

Now switch to the top of the globe and begin the same journey only in a southerly direction. Once I reach the bottom of the globe, I am automatically moving north. Then as before, once I reach the furthest point North, I once again begin to move in a southerly direction.

Now I realize this is useless information that has nothing to do with anything. However, that’s just the way my brain works and this summation of how my cranium operates is more of a Boone than a bane.

This condition (if you will) allows me to fulfill my imagination and create some of the most outlandish creatures. I even tend to surprise myself at some of the beasts that move from my head to the virtual paper plastered across the computer screen.

All in all this has been a great help to me as I develop the complicated plots that tend to arise throughout my books. Thank you for allowing me to bend your ear and I’ll be in touch soon.

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What Scares Me About This Post? To Me It Makes Sense

Through many years of therapy, meetings with counselors, psychologists, psychiatrist, and then finally psychics, and palm readers with no alleviations in my symptoms; inundated with numerous mind altering drugs designed to treat everything from depression to dyslexia and still no relief; I bring my situation to you, my faithful reader.  My problems, I will spell out in order of importance, there being three major malfunctions within my brain.

Number one:  What makes a door nail so much deader than anything else? What about a window nail? After exhaustive years of research I have learned no more than a door nail (being a large decorative nail) used in years long past was driven in the wood and clinched on the other side, effectively making the nail unable to be reused, “or dead” … but even this explanation cannot be proven.

Number two:  Happy as a clam.  Now, pray tell, how could a clam possibly have any reason to experience the internal feeling of joy? It sits on the bottom of the ocean buried in mud waiting for some infinitesimally small creature to drift by giving the clam a meal, once it filters a few thousand of these minute organisms, from the surrounding sea water. The only clams that I have actually seen were sitting on ice in a fish market, cut into strips and

Littleneck clams, small hard clams, species Me...

Littleneck clams, small hard clams, species Mercenaria mercenaria (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

deep-fried, or waiting to be plunged into a pot of boiling water–not the best formula for a happy life. Some fisherman I met in an old seafaring novel tried to tell me that the saying, “happy as a clam,” came from the appearance of a clam shell when it was open, i.e., it looked like it was smiling…I don’t know?

Number three:  If you start on the east coast and begin to travel in an eastward direction, you will first encounter the near east.  If you continue your journey, you will find yourself in the Middle East. Continue on and you’ll wind up in the Far-East… now’s where the problem begins.  Once you pass the Far-East, you will eventually end up back in North America, probably in California.  So, I just traveled twenty-four thousand miles east to end up in the west.

This brings to mind (even in my drug induced condition) that when you’re working on your manuscript you should take the time to erase silly notions from your head (such as door nails, smiling clams, and irrational travel plans) that figure into your writing…it just wouldn’t look good.

I just had another disturbing thought…If a reanimated door nail traveled east, meeting up with a frowning clam at the coast, they then traveled together through the east, ending up on the west coast of North America. After traveling a short distance inland, if a giant redwood tree fell on the pair in a secluded area, smashing the clam shell and driving the nail deep into the ground, would the tree make a sound and would anyone care?

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