Tag Archives: blue jeans

One more time and that’s it… Well maybe two… No more than ten, I promise!… We’ll just leave it open.

Well it’s that time again. Rewrites, rewrites, rewrites!torn jeans I’m in the process of finishing my latest novel so, now it’s time to go back to the beginning and start all over again rewriting what I have already written.

After the first wave of rewrites, revisions and edits are complete, I get to do it all over again. In fact, my second novel took four months to write and three years to rewrite. Each time I would go through the book, I wasn’t happy when I finished. This in turn set the stage for another revamping of the manuscript… Just between you and me, I’m still not satisfied with good ole number two… Guess that means another set of rewrites. Please don’t tell anyone or they’ll kick me out of the “I got my second novel right in less than four years” club; at which point, I will be automatically inducted into the “perhaps you should consider another vocation” club.

How strange we are as human beings that some things must be perfect and then again other things are okay just as they are or we even go to great lengths to turn what is satisfactory into what most would consider substandard.

Case in point:

It seems that in this day and age, advertisers feel that we should whiten our teeth to the point of needing sunglasses whenever we open our mouth. By the same token, we are encouraged to purchase designer jeans, mangled with holes and slits. Thankfully, there’s enough material left to cover our naughty bits.

Of course, these same effects may be achieved at a substantially reduced cost to the consumer.  There’s every reason to practice good dental hygiene and achieve a nice bright smile while avoiding the “supernova mouth.” Brush and floss daily, see your dentist regularly, and stop eating charcoal and other things that stain your teeth.

As far as denim fashion statements go, this one is easy and requires nothing more than normal blue jean maintenance. I can remember embracing the notion that jeans never wear out. I would purchase my favorite brand of jeans. From that point on it was a simple cycle of wash and wear. The first to go were the knees. No surprise there; this was always expected. As the years passed, chinks in the armor would develop in the form of small holes between the pockets and knees. Here was my first experience with the breakaway belt loop where at least one belt loop would become detached, but only on one end.

The knee or what used to be referred to as such, had by now morphed into an irregular shaped cavern with a small flap. After an undetermined amount of time had passed, the holes along what I like to call the quadriceptual vortex would begin to connect forming larger rips, tears, and holes in the space time conjeanuim.  This signaled preselected cotton strands to snap eventually causing a catastrophic failure. The unsuspecting wearer (that being me) oblivious to the true appearance of the most comfortable jeans in the world usually would not come to terms with this life-changing enigma until marriage opened his (once again me) eyes to what truly remained of his (yeah, it’s me) favorite pair of jeans.

As I sink into the depths of despair, I suddenly realized, this isn’t the end. My damage denim is primed for resale.

Ah, but alas, it’s back to the real world… Rewrite….Rewrite…… Rewrite.

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It Done Broked Again!

Foto einer Glühbirne (an),

Foto einer Glühbirne (an), (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If you strip our capitalistic society down to bare bones, it’s all about “buy stuff, sell stuff.” Now within this simple concept, there must be a supply of goods and a supply of buyers with which to purchase these goods. Because of this, Men Who Think Great Thoughts created the notion of “planned obsolescence.”

This idea holds that products have a predetermined moment where they will become obsolete, like a light bulb that eventually needs to be replaced. This mainstay of production serves both the consumer and the manufacturer… well, until taken to the extreme.

For instance, there is a light bulb located within a fire house in Livermore, California, which has been functioning for over 110 years. While the inhabitants of the fire house appreciate this bulb, if all light bulbs were constructed in this fashion, manufacturers would be few and far between.

On the other hand, have you ever replaced a blown light bulb and had the new one flash and die just as you screwed it in? Indeed, this would line the pockets of light bulb salesmen but would probably cause an uprising amongst consumers. This, in turn, would precipitate an increase in muggings of light bulb salesmen laughing their way to the bank.

One place planned obsolescence affects me is in the wearing of blue jeans. As we all know, the longer we wear a well-built denim garment, the better it feels. Notice I did not say “the better it looks.” For once again, we all know the longer we wear that same well-built denim garment, the worse it looks. I would wear my jeans until everything but my naughty bits were exposed. And then sadly hum taps as I buried my old friend in the waste basket.

Slamming on the breaks and shifting into reverse, timeless is what an author wants his work to become. But sometimes, due to a dated storyline, an obscure writing style or anyone of a thousand other things, unplanned obsolescence can slip in and void the work.

In conclusion, when that light bulb blows in the dark of night, stay calm, knowing that a replacement is nearby. But remember, I won’t say that Thomas Edison didn’t invent the incandescent light bulb in 1879. But there was some scuttlebutt about an Englishman named Frederick de Moleyns receiving a patent for the first incandescent light bulb in 1841.

Ain’t life funny?

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