Dean Martin Said and I Paraphrase: As Long as You Can Lie on the Floor Without Falling off You Haven’t had too Much to Drink.

200_s-1I wrote a blog similar to this several years ago. It happened to cross my mind just now and I believe it bears repeating.

Working a construction job nearly one hundred miles from home, we would stop every morning for breakfast.

There was a stack of small cardboard signs for sale that warned against the dangers of drinking. I was so impressed by the writer’s passionate expression that I memorized these inspirational words:

Starkle, starkle little twink, who the heck you are I think.

I’m not under what you call the alcofluence of incohol.

I’m not drunk like thinkle peep, I’m just a little slort on sheep.

I not know who is me yet, but the drunker I stand here the longer I get.

So pour me one more to fill my cup, cause I got all day sober to Sunday up.

Don’t that just clutch ya? Once again it’s been my pleasure to share these words with you. My only regret is I didn’t think of them first. Of course I guess you could say that I was second in line!

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